Dating a person with severe depression
Help them work through it rather than judging or being resentful.So the person you’re dating has admitted they have depression. You really don’t need to change how you treat them or dramatically alter your behaviour.Just because it's one of those days where they're sad, uninterested or anything along those lines, doesn't mean it's because of you or something you did.Sometimes all they need is space, time to be alone for a little while. Even if there isn't a reason, that's just flat out wrong. Putting the blame on someone who has these disorders will only make things worse.Unfortunately, it's not uncommon to meet someone who has anxiety or depression; usually the two co-exist.In relationships, mental illness can make things difficult, especially for those who are unsure of how to react in those types of situations. Being someone who has suffered from both anxiety and depression for years, I know how hard it can be and how much of a strain it can put on a romantic relationship.
Possibilities include genetics or past experiences that could have been traumatizing. "I remember this one time when I was depressed..." isn't empathetic.
The Signs of Depression and Common Reactions First, let’s cover the signs.
If your date or your partner is depressed, you’ll see: sad mood; a negative or hopeless outlook for the future; eating too much or too little; crying out of the blue; loss of or low energy; sleeping too much or too little; indecisiveness; and social isolation or withdrawal.
We’re fine with explaining how it feels to you, but it’s really not our job to educate you on mental illness and what causes depression. I don’t cry 24/7 and I doubt that many depressed people do. We know it’s not a big deal that we’ve lost our socks. It’s just our depression muddies up any excitement or joy we’d usually feel. So don’t assume we’ve magically cured ourselves of depression because we’ve told you we’ve been fine for the last few weeks. Actually expressing that we might need medication is deeply, deeply scary.
And it can get frustrating dating someone who just can’t seem to get their head around it or – worse – ‘doesn’t believe’ in being depressed (IT’S NOT A UNICORN, IT’S A MEDICALLY DEFINED ILLNESS). Don’t doubt us if sometimes we’re perfectly happy and able to get on with things, then can’t get out of bed the next day. But we’re still going to cry and hate ourselves for it. Listen to our entirely illogical explanation for why we’re upset and help us through it. Sometimes we won’t react the way we’re supposed to when you do something lovely or something amazing happens. You casually mentioning any negative opinions on anti-depressants doesn’t help. Missing out on a job can push us into a months-long depressive period. But that doesn’t mean we can’t handle the truth or rubbish things happening.